A trip out and a sick bowl

Hey guys!

I woke today and the sickness was back with a vengeance.

I had to take lots of medication to balance out the sickness and pain and the anxiety.

I always feel like I’m taking pills just to fight the effects of the last pill.

The district nurse came around 11, I struggled to get down the stairs.

This affects me a lot – the constant ache really hits my spirits, it saddens me that at 28 I can hardly walk but I am determined to be stronger.

I’m a typical girl, for years wanting long thin legs and now I have them I would give anything to have strong legs again.

This disease is changing me as a person and I didn’t even realise it was happening.

The nurses are as always lovely –  we are very lucky that they come to us and we don’t have to travel all the way into hospital,.

Sam has lots of inappropriate banter with the nurses and this makes everything a lot lighter and less of an abnormal situation.

I had bloods taken, my picc line cleaned then fluid drained from my new permanent drain – the permanent drain has really changed how I’m feeling and I am so grateful not having to struggle so much.

The nurses left and I was feeling OK.  The medication was doing its thing so we decided to get out of the house and try and go for lunch.

We haven’t done this since I was first admitted to hospital (how life has changed).

We managed to get through lunch, within minutes s of driving home the sickness hit.

Luckily we have sick bowls everywhere so with sickbowl in hand we made it home.

I went straight to bed after taking more medication but when I woke the pain had come back in my legs and back so more medication was needed.

Luckily the medication kicked in but then the hot sweats came.

Sam took my temp and it was 38.7 – when going through chemo it’s really important to keep an eye on my temp, -we were slightly worried as it was 12.20 am and we dreaded the thought of going into hospital so we tried to cool me down with ice pacs and paracetamol.

Slowly it came down to 38.3 and then 37.6, we managed to get it down over a few hours.

I was so relieved and so so tired.

Tomorrow I have chemo agan and a CT scan.

I am nervous about the CT scan but Sam and I talked about it and we know we together are strong enough to get through whatever the results throw at us.

Love Laura xxx